"Bitch" Defined

I found this from a friend....I feel it Joa-blog appropriate. May I also add that finds such as these are so refreshing; as in, it is refreshing that others in the world are of like mind.

Noun: Bitch (bich):
1.A miserable person who sucks all joy and happiness out of life, and makes life a little less worth living by her consistently shitty attitude. When not complaining, her drama and gossip will fill the void. He or she (but usually she) refuses to do something with a group, and will forego hanging out with said group unless they're doing something she wants to do. She will put her interest ahead of others every single time, just for the sake of being a bitch. A bitch hates fun.
"Hey guys, sorry we can't check out that cool new Brazilian restaurant, Janet is being a bitch."

2.A status you assume when you take one in the pooper while incarcerated.
3.What you become when you fail at pool, bowling, Quake, english, math, Street Fighter Alpha, etc.
4.Having a thankless job where you work lots of overtime without pay while your boss is on vacation.
5.Having to sit in the middle seat between two people in a car or plane.
6.Being last in line to get cake or ice cream at a party.
7.Crying and throwing a tantrum about something nobody gives a shit about, including you.
"I'm not going to give you $6 for my share of an $11 pizza when all I owe you is $5.50. I shouldn't have to pay extra, waaaaaah!"
8.Having a high opinion of your looks and a sense of entitlement when people compliment you. Your ego is usually punctuated with a "hottie" shirt, which makes you slightly less tolerable to be around than children, and slightly more tolerable to be around than a saucer of goat cum.

(from http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=fashion)

In addition: please note that in no form do I fit the defined term, aside from the one time I sat in the middle seat on a flight to vancouver, but even then, I was between my sister and my dad, so I feel justified when I say it doesn't count. There is no reference of a "bitch" being that of an honest, up front, and sarcastic (only to the point of entertainment) individual that does not like little dogs or other people's children. For this, I take solice....now excuse me; I must go scream at someone for expecting me to pay for a birthday card I didn't sign because the chick who had the birthday is a total tramp and I wouldn't be caught dead to be seen with her. I also have to make sure that my boss gets his phone messages before I go home as he was napping all afternoon. I would be going out tonight except I absolutely refuse to play laser tag, and besides all those grimey sloppy assholes who DO like to go to those kinds of places creep me out. Instead I am going to stay home and take self portraits of myself with my camera, like the sexy pouty kind that I can post on Facebook later and gleefully reply "thanks" to when someone comments on how hot I look in them.

Goodnight.